Singer, drag artist, foster carer

Stuart, a foster carer with Rochdale Borough Council, is a singer and drag artist. He was approved to foster just over a year ago and is looking after a 16-year-old boy through supported lodgings. Like Barry and Andi, Stuart has been able to combine being a foster carer with his work.  “It has been great,” he says. “I’ve really enjoyed it. He’s settled in really well.”

Their home in Rossendale is in a rural setting, not far from where Stuart’s foster son was living previously, so he has been able to remain in touch with people he knows and continue with activities he enjoys.

Stuart, who is 40, says he was inspired to become a foster carer by a friend, who wrote a book about their time in care. “I read her book three years ago and I was so moved by her experience. I decided then that I would look into foster care when I felt I was ready.

“I have been working in clubs for years and dealing with live audiences, so I’m not easily shocked. I’ve worked with people from all walks of life. I’ve been there and done it. I think I am laid back and I know that young people need their own space and the freedom to make their own choices.”

Stuart says that he felt strongly supported by Rochdale Council throughout the application process. “I always felt comfortable during the process,” he says. “I never felt that I was being judged because of my sexuality or my work. What was important was making sure that I was able to provide a safe and loving home and that I had the right support in place.” 

His assessment to foster was a rewarding experience, Stuart says. “I was assigned a social worker who accompanied me through the process, who has always been very supportive. The assessment gave me time to reflect on my own life experience and how I would respond to the challenges of being a foster carer.

“I was very truthful about my life and who I am. I was open and honest, and I was always treated with respect.

“Rochdale were brilliant at finding a good match between me and the young person, bearing in mind my other commitments. I have not changed my lifestyle, and I have been able to continue doing everything I was doing before.”

As well as giving live performances, Stuart has a local part-time job in the mornings. Juggling his work commitments and caring responsibilities has been made easier by having a strong support network in the community.  He was single and living alone when he applied to foster but now has a partner, Ladislav, who is going through the application process to become a foster carer too. 

"The fact that we were a gay couple was never an issue."

Michael and his husband Liam have been fostering with Rochdale Council for three years. They are looking after a brother and sister in long-term foster care and have recently welcomed two more children. Since being approved as foster carers they have moved from Lancashire to Rochdale, where the children are settled in local schools, and have a bigger house to accommodate their growing foster family.

“Liam and I have always wanted children,” says Michael. “We did consider adoption but we felt we could make a real difference as foster carers.

“We love being a part of the children’s lives and watching them grow and fulfil their potential. Our home is full of life, there’s always loads going on.”

Both Michael and Liam have worked in housing and have experience in supporting children and young adults in the community. Michael left his job in 2020 to focus on fostering, while Liam continues to work full-time. “Our experience has really helped us as foster carers to understand children and young people and to find the support they need.”

They both felt it was important to foster for the local authority, rather than an agency, to help local children maintain links with their families and other important people in their lives. “Two of our children lived with their Nana for seven years and she’s a big part of their lives,” he says. “She lives locally so it is easy for them to get to see her. They also go to school and have friends here.”

Michael is a member of Rochdale Council’s Mockingbird Hub for foster carers and their families. The scheme provides a fostering community for carers and their children. “It gives us a group of friends who understand what fostering is about. We support each other and our children, a bit like big extended families, with activities and sleepovers and so on.”

Michael and Liam were given a warm welcome as a same-sex couple by Rochdale Council and never felt uncomfortable. “The fact that we were a gay couple was never an issue,” he says. “It wasn’t a barrier to fostering for the local authority.

“If I had any anxiety it was about how children asked to live with us might feel. When our children arrived, we encouraged them to be open and honest with their feelings about us. One of our foster children has simply said: ‘As long as you love each other, I don’t care.’”